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02/24/2003 Entry: "Strange dreams, strange contracts"

I had the weirdest dream last night. It started out with me clocking in for a shift at a McDonalds. It was breakfast. People were running hither and yon. I was talking to the manager about whether she was able to schedule someone to help me with salads or not. She was, but she needed me to make some Egg McMuffins right then. So I walked to the main part of the kitchen, and the place was trashed! If you know me, you know two things: a) I love to cook, and b) I can't work in a messy kitchen.

Cut to next part of dream. I'm trying to kill a cat. Why? I don't know. I do know I wanted to do it humanely, though. So, I was using a .22 black powder rifle. Strange. If you know anything about black powder, you'll realize that they don't come in such a small caliber. Anyway, I load this black powder deal-y, powder first, then wad, then bullet. I put the muzzle to the cat's head, and pull the trigger. Nothing. No, I reload another round, on top of the load already in there! Now I've got a double charge in there. Again, I pull the trigger. Nothing. The I realize I'm using a percussion cap rifle, and didn't put a cap on the nipple. How silly of me!

Then I woke up. No actual cats were injured in the dream.

Check this out. They're ridders from contracts from rock stars. ZZ Top's is pretty weird, with some special recipe cocktail weenies needed. Lots of performers want white socks. Lot's also request Solo name brand cups. I'll have to let you know what I want on my ideal rider. I'm pretty sure I'd want KFC Original Recipe. What would you choose?